my potrait

Made by a friend, dunno what really to say, but feel kinda honoured ;)

I still do feel this way, if only, I was surer of what I feel...(God forgive me)
.............................................................

One day
Things were going right
All my goals were just in sight,
In my heart, arose a tune
As serene as the beautiful moon
Though I forgot most of its lines,
One remained all fresh and fine –
‘My castles still stand, though built of sand,
Because at work, is His hand’.
The mighty verse, it filled inside
And all the shadows seemed to be cast aside.
The cool wind whispered as it passed by,
Never let this faith die.
...
Today
Everything is turning worse
I feel like I am under a curse
No song, no rhyme, no prayer, no hymn
All my hopes are less than slim
My castles are all broken down,
The crown is replaced by a frown
I asked of Him, ‘Why desert me?’
I demanded Him to be my lee
And the cold wind shrieked into my ears
‘Humility, you fool, kneel and hear’
And lo! When I knelt ‘n’ a tear rolled down,
I knew it was me, who had let Him down.
...
Now
Here I am, and I cry and I cry
So happy, He’s given me one more try
As my sobbing heart does heave
Bit by bit my grief too leaves.
A silent song again rises inside,
‘I shall throw all my doubts aside
And my castles will surely stand,
Whether of brick or clay or sand,
Because at work, is His hand,
Because at work is His hand.
...

This is the first pic of Kurt Cobain that I saw...scared the hell out of me, I mean, he does look scary. Jimi was pretty amused when I said that. And this was the pic that sent me 'googling' for Kurt Cobain and Nirvana.
For the first few days, I was hooked onto Smells like... only. Then Come As You Are, Lithium and many more songs were discovered. Why am I talking about Nirvana right now? Because, I just wanted to mention that Kurt is partly the inspiration for 'saw you feeding the ...' . (Him & someone else whom I cannot mention). Somehow I just had to put this down. Kurt s been haunting me for the past few days...May his soul rest in peace.

The Busy Man

Not that I don’t long for you,
Don’t think, don’t miss, don’t pain,
But I live the life of a busy man with
No time to spend in vain.
How each day of mine passes!
I slog from morning till late night
Then I decide I shall write to you
But end up just sleeping tight.
You know the woes of a busy man,
Now, don’t you, my dear –
Every minute is of great value
But don’t you have any fear
‘Cause every time I see the flowers,
The cards, the gifts, the cake-shop
All those birthdays and dates I ‘ve missed,
Right back into my mind they drop
And I pause, and I stand for a while
May be, I should give you a call
The next moment my mobile beeps
O! The stock market has taken a fall.

Saw you feeding the crocodiles

Weird ways you’ve got,
Strange eyes speak of
Stranger wars being fought.
The lessons you were taught
If you see a hopeless life,
You would rather let it rot.

You crept away
You thought nobody saw,
But I was there, alright,
And I couldn’t believe my own two eyes
When I saw you feeding the crocodiles.

Strange eyes.
Strange wars.
Hopeless lives.
Let them rot.

What is it that you see
That you choose to defile
Your very own, shelter, your very own tree.
Why is it that you would rather flee
When you actually can rise up
And let your life be merry.
But the lessons you were taught…

You crept away
You thought nobody saw,
But I was there, alright,
And I couldn’t believe my own two eyes
When I saw you feeding the crocodiles.

Strange eyes.
Strange wars.
Hopeless lives.
Let them rot.

The Pretender

How many masks can I wear?
Just how many more?
I need a thousand-and-one masks each day of my life,
I need thousand-and-one pretences to walk along,
A million lies, to tell myself,
It’s worth it to go on.
Within these fabrics,
What is it that I think?
Within this ‘somebody’
Who am I?

I am the pretender
Lost to myself,
Lost in the numerous identities
In the sands of the unknown.

And one day when I am out of supplies,
Will you, my friend, lend me one?
Just one more lie.
Just one more push, to go on.
Alas! If only someone knew me.
If only I knew me.
If only I knew me.

I am the pretender.
I survive on self-deceit.
I have lost myself
Lost in the numerous identities
In the sands of the unknown.